RAMBLING THOUGHTS ON A FALL DAY

Once again, the fall season has arrived in the rockies. The shadows are long and lazy, the days are hot, the evenings cool, and the elk up in the high country are "rutting",otherwise known as mating. Fall here is much more like summer than summer usually is. The temps rise, and the rain and thunder storms stop. The weather seems to stabilize,as though it's grown weary. Having burned itself out, it simmers on low---until its flame sighs, and winter reclaims the land. There will be no sign of summer and the starkness and early dark evenings can dampen the spirit. Have we been forsaken? Left alone? The leaves, so golden now, blow away, the flowers finally surrender their beauty to the below freezing nights, and the grass slowly turns yellow, then brown. Most of us put on our snow tires, pull on our boots, and crank up the heat. The winter air gets so dry and devoid of humidity here 5000 feet up, that eye drops and lotion are a daily ritual. In spite of that, it is a lovely time of year, the native Aspen trees blinding the eye with their copper colors. But for me, it gets harder and harder to say good-bye to summer. I will miss it, and wait impatiently, like a lover waits, impatient and longing for one more summer and the embrace of warmth and high joy that only lots of sun and outdoor activities can deliver.

There can be comfort in extreme cold. It requires fireplaces, warm, cuddly clothes, down comforters, hot chocolate, and cozy evenings spent with family and friends warming the nights with friendship and love. There is also a sort of heartiness that is born of getting through a tough winter---one takes it on, deals with it, and even makes friends with it. At the end of a 4 below freezing day, after you've made it home over icey, slushy streets, you feel like a survivor of the first order. There are, of course, people who not only tolerate, but worship winter---they are called skiers and they can't wait for snow and cold. We have a neighbor who drives almost every weekend to Telluride, which is a 6 hour drive, so that he can experience the rush of a downhill run. This is indeed world class ski country, and snow is the skier's sunshine and the ski industry's manna from heaven. I wish I shared their enthusiam---but I don't. I used to ski until another skier hit me broadside, and practically knocked my lights out, then skied full speed away. That was my last down hill run.

So, here we are again, facing one more winter---actually, it's not so bad. Next month, I'll put out the Halloween decorations, fill the porch with pumkins and mum plants, bake a pumpkin pie, and invite someone over for a chili supper. Summer will once again be a memory. The good news is that, unlike some things in life, summer always returns. The question becomes, as one becomes older---will we? Will life go on as we know it, or will we move on like the worn leaves? I will miss summer.

Last year at this time, we had already had a snow storm. This September has un-summerly brought 90 degree days. Perhaps it won't leave us after all---maybe she likes it here. You never know---global warming may be turning everything upside down. But wait--now they're saying that global warming wasn't quite as severe as we had been led to believe. What's up with that? Was Al Gore and his movie, "An Inconvenient Truth" not the truth? Was it all a sort of rush to judgement in order to save the planet from--- a hunch? Or, cynically, one wonders, to line the pockets of those who would profit from all the new energy requirements? Oh, but they were so sure--and "they" were some of the world's top scientists---but, alas, also very human, subject to error and premature eagerness to conclude without all the facts. Like Stephen Hawkings, acclaimed physicist and famous author of "A Brief History of Time", who is now claiming the universe did and does not need a God or any kind of intelligent design in order to begin out of nothing but nothingness,they preach loud and authoritatively what they believe. Our existence according to Mr. Hawkings and his ilk, just happened as a result of a series of events. Oh, Mr. Hawkings, that's even harder to believe than global warming--or that there's a God. Are you sure you're not falling victim to a bit of hubris? In other words, what you can't fathom, you simply deny? Well, it's your business, but I think I'll err on the side of a divine possibility. What if what we can't explain or comprehend may simply be too profound and complex for even top scientists to wrap their minds around? Amazing and humbling thought, but possible. If there is a God, He must wonder at times if He may have made just the tiniest of mistakes by giving us a brain capable enough to survive, and even thrive----but not enough to understand for certain that He exists. But it seems He did not want puppets or robots of his creation, marching like wind-up toys to his wishes. and so He gambled that we would "see the light" from the evidence all around us. Faith is the operative word. But faith requires suspension of human logic sometimes, and the human brain rejects that concept---unless faith enters the heart. It is after all, a brain, not a soul.

The seasons remind that there is a time for living and a time for dying---but that even in the face of death, there is hope for re-birth. The elk know that for sure. I love summer, will enjoy the fall, endure another winter, but live for next spring, when life begins all over again. Stephen Hawkings or not, watching a tree lose its leaves, become nothing but a spray of dead branches, then bud and bloom full and leafy once again, is proof enough for me that all things are possible. We are not alone---the universe is not one big accident, nor are we. We are part of a much bigger picture---too big to fail, one might say. And much too big and marvelous to dismiss as coincidence. The autumn leaves may fall, along with temperatures, and snow. Listen to it all one quiet day---and consider that there is no end and no beginning---just the stream of life. Don't know about you all, but I choose to believe we are part of that stream, which will someday reach its destination---where it's spring all year long and summer is the zenith and the beautiful bow of a great and wonderful gift, the giver of which is known in some circles as the Alpha and the Omega--the first and the last ---or God.